The end of the day. I’m sitting here listening to a song, A little Bit Stronger by Sara Evans. Take a listen and you will see where it all lays. Then while listening I’m reading…yes I’m reading at the same time. This is the paragraph I just read,
“What surprised her was how she felt devastated all over again. Sure, she could always remember, intellectually, how difficult it had been to get over him, but it had been a long, long time since she’d actually physically experienced those feelings. The anxiety, the nausea, the hope. But that wasn’t the problem. What sent her reeling is that she remembered just how much she had liked James. Just how much she did like his wit and intelligence and handsome looks. Even if she hated him, too.”
It’s funny how everyone can experience this love.hate relationship. At the beginning of heartache it seems impossible to move on. It’s a period of feeling sad. Crying. (yep, sometimes I’m still crying) As time goes on it does get a little easier to swallow the tears and I do…(cliche’) “Feel a Little Bit Stronger”. The realization of reality. Acceptance of being done with the spinning wheels and the sadness.
Yes, I returned to an impossible situation but everything at the time seemed impossible.
I think in time we both will get over all past decisions and just be happy where we are. Where we remain is exactly where we are supposed to be. Now, we just make the effort to be where we are. No longer an effort of what I wished for but a change in acceptance of what we are now.
P.S.-I don’t really hate you.